Back on Track

This morning marks our first visit to TEACHH. The evaluation, which is not being called an evaluation since there are no "formal" tests, will help to determine the steps or direction TEACHH will take. I am very interested in what they have to say...some days my heart is filled to the brim with pride and love with the progress I see Braden taking...and then some days I try hard not to cry and scream with frustration over the battles we fight. Overall, though, I have seen some great improvements...his speech is coming along, he is using 3 - 4 word phrases now, he can say "b" and "p" although he hasn't not applied them to words with those sounds. Yesterday he came up to me in the kitchen, hugged my leg, and said "I love you." Can I just say I melted because this was the first time I can remember him saying those words without being prompted! (I get teary eyed just thinking about it). And for some of you, it might blow you away to realize that this was one of the first times, it's one of those things you take for granted...I love you. It's hard for Braden to share how he feels...he knows happy and not happy and now he may be beginning to understand or feel love. Oh, please! I've also noticed him using some imaginative play. He was Jojo's prince (Heather called me the minute it happened, when Braden kissed Princess Jojo to wake her up) to him using trains or bath toys to create conversation between them. He's also been asking me to join in, Mama, be so and so...although I could scream if I have to play Thomas the Train again. So, needless to say, I'm really interested in what TEACHH has to say.
We've been trying a variety of strategies with Braden. We have him on the gluten/casein free diet, he has been receiving community based rehabilitative services, speech, occupational therapy, Heather has done some ABA therapy with him, and Beverly has had him out to her farm for riding therapy. He also goes to pre-school and this fall will be going three days a week. Ya!!! This will be much needed mommy time! He has been going twice a week and I relish those mornings I have "off." In addition to all of the therapies, I make us get out of the house. It would be so much easier to stay home, to stick to routine, and not have any melt downs. But this really doesn't help Braden, it doesn't give him the opportunity to use or learn some much needed social/transitional/environmental behaviors. It even helps me to learn social niceties when I have to learn to calm down and not scream at the top of my lungs or swat a little boy's behind when out in public, especially after I have been slapped, hit, screamed at by Braden. Some day I will have to write about some of our public outings and the displays experienced in an attempt to explain how hard to can be. But, since I just lived through one when I took Braden to the Pittsburgh Zoo last week, I really don't want to have to relive it just yet.
Thanks for taking the journey with us. Yes, it's easier to keep it all in and pretend that we are the perfect family. But then again, no, it's not. It's easier to share our journey, to receive support and advice and love...something Braden is hopefully starting to learn himself.